SIKH RELIGION AND DIVORCE

 

isK Drm Aqy “qlwk”

.gurU ipAwirE,

vwihgurU jI kw Kwlsw vwihgurU jI kI Pqih]

Aj kl dy smwj ivc qlwk Awm islislw bxdw jw irhw hY[ isK smwj vI ies smwjk burweI qoN nhI b`c sikAw Aqy idnoo-idn ieh smwjk burweI vDdI nzr Aw rhI hY[

“s`cIAW srkwrW” sRI gurU gMRQ swihb jI mhwrwj jI dI hzUrI ivc AnMd kwrj krvwaux qoN bwAd, is`K ivAwhk joVy ies jIvn-iekrwr qy jIvn swQ qoN B`jdy Awm vyKy jw rhy hn! vyKw-vyKI ieh vyG vDdw jw irhw hY[ ijQy ijQy is`K BweIcwrw sMswr ivc vsdw hY, auQy auQy ieh smwjk burweI nwl hI vyKI jw rhI hY[ ijQy is`K prvwr cotI dIAW qy isKrW dIAW kdrW-kImqW nMU inBwaudy Awey hn qy bhuq lok inBw vI rhy hn, auQy Aj “qlwk” dI ieh smwjk burweI vI swfy smwj ivc bhulqw ivc PYlI nzr Aw rhI hY[

isK Drm ivc koeI qlwk nhI huMdw, nw hI AwigAw idqI geI hY qy nw hI isK Drm “qlwk” nMU prvwx krdw hY[ sRI gurU gRMQ swihb jI dI sm`ucI bwxI ivc iek vwrI vI “qlwk” Sbd nhI vriqAw igAw[ jy is`K Drm ivc qlwk prvwx kIqw igAw huMdw qW, mwP krnw, Swied iek gurm`q ivc “qlwk kwrj” dI vI rsm hoxI sI!

qlwk dI siQqI dy phuMcx dy keI kwrn huMdyy hn[ aunW ivcoN kuJ kwrn jwiez ho vI skdy hn! aunW siQqIAW ivc vI kuJ auprwly kIqy jw skdy hn qy krny bxdy vI hn[ loVINdI qbdIlI ilAwaux nwl irSqy mzbUq ho jWdy hn qy peIAW ivQW dUr ho skdIAW hn[ kuJ kwrn bhuq mmUlI vI hMudy hn ijnHW krky qlwk vl jwxW nw hI SoBdw hY sgoN by-loVw vI huMdw hY[ jy hr irSqy nMU mzbUq, cMgw qy vDyry suKdweI bxwaux nMU iek idlcsp cuxOqI smJ ky, ies qy kMm kIqw jwvy, auprwly kIqy jWx qW swfw smwj, swfy prvwr, swfIAW prvwrk kdrW kImqW ikqy dIAW ikqy isKrW qy phMuc jwx!

b`icAW dw Biv`K, mwipAW dI eykqw qy ipAwr qy inrBr hMudw hY Aqy prvwrk eykqw qy KVw hY[ AwiKAw igAw hY ik ijhVy b`cy iek sohxy hsdy, vsdy prvwr ivc v`fy huMdy hn auh BivK ivc Awp vI cMgy prvwr nMU auswrn dI izAwdw mwhrqw, sihj suBwie hI rKdy hn! ies dy ault ijhVy b`cy Awp tu`ty hoey prvwr ivc v`fy hMudy hn, auhnW dw Awpxw prvwr Awaux vwly smyN ivc iesy siQqI ivcoN lMGx dI ikqy izAwdw sMBwvnw rKdw hY! ieh Koj swieMsdwnW Aqy mwhr KojIAW vloN ho cukI hY Aqy AMkiVAW Anuswr ieh iek prvwxk scweI hY[

AwE ivcwrIey, ik jdoN iksy ivAwhk joVy (married couple) dI Ax-bx ho jwvy jW swfy smwj dw kI rol hoxw cwhIdw hY! AsI ieh lyK gurm`q Anuswr ivcwrWgy ikau ik AsI isK Drm Aqy AnMd kwrj bwry gl kr rhy hW[ vYsy bhuq swry ivcwr bVy sDwrn hox krky ikqy vI vrqoN ivc ilAwey jw skdy hn, Bwv zrUrI nhI ik joVw XW prvwr is`K Drm nwl sMbMDq hI hovy! koeI vI prvwr, iksy vI Drm nwl sMbMD rKx vwlw hovy, ienHW jugqIAW rwhI lwB auTw skdw hY[

ies qoN pihlW ik AsI ivAwhk jIvn ivc bxy iksy Ax-bx XW qlwk vwly islisly dI gl ivsQwr nwl krIey, AwE ies gl vl iDAwn dyeIey ik ivAwh Bwv AnMd kwrj vyly isiKAw dyx dI kI AihmIAq hY!

kuJ swl XW kih leIey iek dhwky XW do dhwikAW pihlW AnMd kwrj ivc lwvW qoN auprMq isiKAw idqI jWdI sI[ies ivc kuJ kImqI glW smJweIAW qy dsIAW jWdIAW sn[ mYnMU Awpxw bcpn Xwd hY jdoN myry dwdw jI, pRo: krqwr isMG jI (hoiSAwrpur vwly) iksy nw iksy AnMd kwrj ivc isiKAw idMdy huMdy sn[ iek Kws izkr sWJw krnw cwhuMdw hW[ cMfIgV ivc iek auGy prvwr dy bicAW dy AnMd kwrj ivc myry dwdw jI ny isiKAw idqI[ ivAwhy jwx vwly joVy (couple) Aqy sMgq nMU sMboDn krdy hoey ieh glW khIAW, ijs dw Bwv kuJ hyT ilKy vyrvy vwlw hY[

“ bIbw jI, Aj qoN bwAd Awpxy mwipAW dy nwl nwl Awpxy s`s-suhrw swihb nMU Awpxy hI mwpy smJxw!” ieh gl bVy pRBwvSwlI qrIky nwl dwdw jI suxw rhy sn[ ieqnI ku gl, myry iKAwl ivc sB ny ikqy hor vI suxI hovygIy pr ijhVI AglI gl dwdwjI ny ies dy nwl hI joV ky khI auuh dws ny ikqy hor hux q`k nhI suxI!

auh ieh sI ik “kwkw jI, Aj qoN bwAd Awp jI ny vI Awpxy s`s-shurw swihb nMU Awpxy hI mwpy smJxw hY! qy ausy qrW hI vrqxw hY ijvy Awpxy mwipAW nwl vrqIdw hY!” ieh gl dwdw jI ny aus qoN vI vD pRBwvSwlI qrIky nwl “kwkw jI” nMU sMboDn kridAW khI!

ikqnIAW sohxIAW Aqy suKdweI glW dwdw jI ny sWJIAW krnIAW AnMd kwrjW ivc! aunHW dw ieh lYkcr mYN jdoN d`s ku swl dw hovWgw, aus vyly suixAw sI[ Aj q`k, aunHW dI ieh gl, dws nMU Xwd hY qy pMFwl dw auh idRS vI ijs ivc suSoBq sMgq, sRI gurU gRMQ swihb jI dI hzUrI ivc ieh gl sux rhI sI[

smW kuJ Agy viDAw[ kuJ vIrW XW prvwrW ny dwdw jI nMU ieh kihxw ik isiKAW dyx dI kI loV hY? Aj kl dy b`cy bVy isAwxy hn, sB jwxdy hn[ qusI isiKAw nw idAw kro! ies dI kI loV hY?

dwdw jI, pRo krqwr isMG jI, Political Science dy pRoPYsr sn[ aunHW bVw sohxw qy FukvW jvwb dyxw ies gl dw! Awp jI ny kihxw ik jdoN iksy dyS dw pRDwn mMqrI, dyS dy pRDwn mMqrI bxn ligAW sON cukdw hY, kI auh aus vyly b`cw XW “inAwxW” huMdw hY? kI aus nMU pqw nhI huMdw ik aus dIAW kI kI izMmyvwrIAW hn? aus nMU sB kuJ pqw hox dy bwvjUd vI sON cukxI pYNdI hY[ jy iek pRDwn mMqrI nMU vI AwpxI Position qy bYTx ligAW sON cukxI pYNdI hY qW AsI Pyr kOx hW? swnMU vI isiKAw dyxI qy suxnI AqI zrUrI hY[ swnMU vI h`k nhI ik ibnW gRihsqI jIvn dIAW jugqIAW suixAW gRihsqI jIvn ivc pRvyS krIey[ ikqnw ipAwrw Logic aunHW ny sWJw krnw!

ieh ipCokV vyKdy qy mwxdy hoey, myrI smJ Anuswr Aj kl vI Aqy Awaux vwly AnMd kwrjW ivc vI, ieh isiKAw dyx dw pRogrwm hoxw cwhIdw hY[

siqguru imlY q gurmiq pweIAY swkq bwjI hwrI jIau ]3]

(pMnw 597, rwg soriT, pw:1)

Awau Awpxy ivSy vl Agy ivcwr vDweIey!

jdoN iksy joVy, Bwv pqI/ pqnI dI ikqy Axbx ho jwvy qW kI krnw bxdw hY[ vYsy qW pqI-pqnI dw Awpxw hI Prz hY, ik iek dUsry nwl gl-bwq rwhIN lgwqwr sWJ bxweI rKx qy loVINdI Gwt nMU pUrw krn dy Xqn Awpxw Sugl, SOk, Prz Aqy izMmyvwrI smJx!

pr keI vwrI gl iksy vI kwrn krky A`gy inkl jWdI hY[ Kws kr Aj kl dy mhOl ivc qW dyKw dyKI qlwk hoxy SuRrU ho gey hn[ sRI gurU gRMQ swihb jI dI hzUrI ivc lwvW lY ky, jIvn swQ inBwaux dw pRx krky XW smJ ky, keI keI swlW bwAd vI qlwk huMdy Awm vyKy jWdy hn[ ieh iek scweI hY ik sRI gurU gRMQ swihb jI dI hzUrI ivc hoey hzwrW hI AnMd kwrj ipCly swlW ivc sMswr Br dIAW AdwlqW ivc qoVy gey hn qy ieh islislw jwrI hY[ iek pwsy AsI ipAwr nwl sRI gurU gRMQ swihb jI nMU s`cIAW srkwrW kih ky siqkwr krdy hW qy dUjy pwsy aunHW dy hzUrI ivc hoey AnMd kwrn nMU qoVn ligAW r`qw vI pRhyz nhI krdy! ieh swfI qrsXog qy hwso-hIxI hwlq bxI peI hY[

kI swfy isK smwj dw ies ivc koeI rol bxdw hY? jy bxdw hY qW kI? swnMU siqgurW ny is`K bxwieAw hY jo dUijAW dy duK-suK ivc sWJ krdw hoieAw kuJ nw kuJ auprwlw krdw hI rihMdw hY[

isK dw syllabus smwjk qOr qy ies pRkwr hY:

Awie imlu gurisK Awie imlu qU myry gurU ky ipAwry ] rhwau ]

pr Awm vyKx ivc ieh Awaudw hY ik qlwk q`k phMucI hoeI siQqI ivc koeI ivrlw hI irSqydwr XW dosq cMgw rol inBwaudw hY XW inBwaux dI soc rKdw hY[ sB ies qrIky nwl pwsw v`ty nzr Awaudy hn ijvy ieh joVy nMU pCwxdy hI nw hox! jwxdy vI nw hox! ieh ikqnI APsos vwlI g`l hY Aqy iek s`cy idAwnqdwrI vwly isK dI pirBwSw qoN ikqy duryfy mihsUs huMdI hY[

“ieh ienHw dw Awpxw mslw hY!”, “AsI kI lYxw?”, “swnMU kI?”, “Agly dy Gr bYsMqr dyvqw AwieAw hY, Awaux idau!” ….ieQoN q`k ik bhuq swry lok qW kljug dI cl rhI ruq dy ADIn ho ky ieh vI socdy hoxgy “ik cMgw hoieAw! ienHW dw Gr auJVn idau!” mwP krnw, ieh swfy smwj dIAW Aj kl dIAW scweIAW hn, koeI AqkQnIAW nhIN hn!

ijhVy lok ivAwh dy smyN qy qsvIrW iKcvwaudy nhI sn Qkdy, auh Aj lBdy hI nhI ik ikQy jw lu`ky hn, ausy qrW ijvy gvwcy dI qlwS krnI pvy qy gvwicAw hoieAw lBy hI nw! ieQoN qk ik ijnHw ny AnMd kwrj ivc hwzrI vI BrI huMdI hY, auh vI lw-pqw hI ho jWdy hn Xw Pyr Swied lMBy smyN leI ikqy CutI qy qur gey huMdy pRqIq huMdy hn!

swfy Dwrmk qbky ivc vI ieh glW Awm hI vyKIAw jWdIAW hn[ smwjk izMmyvwrIAW auQy vI koeI ivrlw hI smJdw hY[ sB lok rUhwnIAq dw fMkw qW vjwaudy hn pr ienswnIAq dI cwl koeI ivrlw hI cldw hY[ ijvyN purwqn simAW ivc gurU swihb jI dw is`DW nwl vwrqwlwp bwry XW aus smyN dy is`DW dy vqIry bwry, BweI swihb BweI gurdws jI Purmwaudy hn, auh hI vrqwrw, Aj dw isK Dwrmk BweIcwrw vI kridAW nzr Aw irhw hY:

isD Cip bYTy prbqI kauxu jgiqR kau pwir auqwrw]

swfI puSwk qW isMGW XW isKW vwlI hY pr model, mwP krnw jI, “isDW” vwlw hI bixAw hoieAw nzr Aw irhw hY[ jy nMbr dyxy hox qW clo 90% kih leIey ik isDW vwlw hI sB isKW dw vqIrw bixAw nzr AwauNdw hY[ Prk ieqnW hI hY ik “is`D” prbqW vwly AsQwnW qy jw ky smwj qoN indifferent ho jWdy sI qy AsI Ajoky isK, SihrW ivc rihMdy hoey hI, dUsirAW pRqI ieh indifference DwrI qy ApxweI bYTy hW[

AweIey muV gurmq dy ivSy qy, ieh gurmq dI cwl nhI! gurm`q eykqw isKwaudI hY!  lokW nMU, prvwrW nMU, jQybMdIAW nMU iekiTAW krnw gurm`q Awpxw Prz qy izMmyvwrI smJdI hY qy ies dy pUirAW hox au~qy Awpxy DMn-Bwg mihsUs krdI hY[ hWjI, gurmq ieh isKwaudI hY

ieho ivcolw Awix imlwvY ]

gurm`q ies cwl dI pujwrI hY, ies cwl nMU hr iksm dy JgVy leI vrqdI hY[ kI cwl hY jI, auh?

hoie iekqR imlhu myry BweI duibDw dUir krhu ilv lwie ]
hir nwmY ky hovhu joVI gurmuiK bYshu sPw ivCwie ]1]

ies cwl nMU ApxwieAW qy AmlI qOr qy vrqidAW, sB glW dw hl inkl AwauNdw hY[ gurm`q sB nMU iek prvwr smJdI hoeI eykqw dw auprwlw krnw Awpxw Prz smJdI hY:

ibliC ibnod Awnµd suK mwxhu Kwie jIvhu isK prvwr ]1]

gurm`q, Awpxy ivhVy ivc hoey AnMd kwrj dy hr pihlU Aqy p`K nMU pUrw huMdw vyKxw vI AwpxI izMmyvwrI smJdI hY Aqy iesy ivc hI ies dI KuSI hY[

gurm`q ivc “Awpxw” prvwr dw sMDrB bhuuq ivSwl qy bhuq vfw hY[ auQy “Awpxw” prvwr dw cOigrdw bhuq vfw huMdw hY[ gurmq swnMU sB isKW nMU prvwr dw dwierw ieh d`s rhI hY:

“ijsu nwmu irdY iqsu vf prvwrw ]”

ienHW ivcwrW rwhI swnMU ies gl dw igAwn ho irhw hY ik swnMU sB isK prvwrW nMU Aqy ies qoN vI Agy sB jgq nMU Awpxw hI prvwr smJdw cwhIdw hY[ siqgurW ny qW AYlwn krky kih hI idqw ik aunW dw prvwr kOx hY:

suKI bsY moro pirvwrw ]syvk is`K sBY krqwrw ]2]

ienHw gurmq ivcwrW nMU Apxwaudy hoey, sB nMU iek prvwr smJdy hoey AwE Awpxy Prz pihcwxIey!

Industry circles ivc ieh concept Awm pRclq hn:

·       Third Party peace-making interventions

·       Conflict resolutions

ieQoN qk ik goirAW XW iesweIAW dy smwj ivc Marriage Restoration XW Marriage Reconciliation concept Awm pRclq vyKy jWdy hn[ pr swfw isK smwj ienHW glW qoN by-iPkr hoieAw qy AxgihlI vrqdw, rswql vl ruiVAw jw irhw hY[ loV hY Awpxy isK smwj ivc ienHW syvwvW nMU pRclq krn dI!

kuJ hyT ilKy ivcwr sMgq dy ivcwr gocry hwzr hn[ ienHw ivcwrW (ideas / suggestions) dI implementation krn nwl swfy smwj ivc bhuq vfw suDwr Aw skdw hY[ ies swfw Brosw hY jI!

1)         irSqydwrW dw rol XW Prz: guris`KI Anuswr jdoN koeI Gr ivc sm`isAw Aw jWdI hY qW kdrW-kImqW nMU mu`K rKidAW qy idAwnqdwrI nMU vrqidAW, Gr dy sMbMDq irSqydwrW nMU, Kws krky jo QoVI vfI aumr Aqy qjrby vwly hox, smisAwvW nMU h`l krnw cwhIdw hY[AYsw krn nwl irSqydwrW dI gurisKI bwry smJ qy soJI action ivc AwauNdI nzr AwvygI Aqy aunHW irSqydwrW dI vifAweI vI pRgt hovygI[ BwvyN swrw isK BweIcwrw iek prvwr hY pr GrylU muidAW nMU muK rKidAW, irSqydwrW dw Prz bxdw hY ik joVy nMU iekiTAW ibTw ky aunW nwl gl bwq krn Aqy aunHW dIAW problems nMU smJdy hoey aunHW dI mdd krn[ ieh kyvl Prz jI nhI smiJAw jWxw cwhIdw sgoN izMmyvwrI vI smJxI cwhIdI hY[

pr dyKx ivc Awaudw hY, ik ieh izMmyvwrI koeI ivrlw hI irSqydwr inBwaudw hY jo “smwjk guris`KI” dI smJ rKdw hovy qy Awpxy PrzW nMU pUirAW krnw Drm dw AMg smJdw hovy!

2)         dosqW/ imqrW dw Prz: ieh vI vyKx ivc Awaudw hY ik jdoN ivAwhk joVw iksy Ax-bx dw iSkwr ho jwvy qW bhuqy “im`qr / dosq” ikqy dUr hI B`j jwdy hn[ koeI AwpxI bxdI izMmyvwrI nhI smJdw qy pCwxdw! ienHW mOikAW qy ivcoly dI AiqAMq loV huMdI hY[jdoN koeI qIjI cMgI inrp`K iDr ivc Aw jwvy qW auh bhuq sohxw qy cMgw rol inBwA skdI huMdI hY qy ivAwhk joVy nMU Pyr iek`iTAW krn dI SkqI rKdI hY[

cMgy Aqy AslI dosq / im`qr bhuq cMgI syD dy skdy huMdy hn qy ipAwr Aqy hwsy-Kyfy ivc hI joVy nUM iek`iTAW krn ivc bhuq sohxw rol inBw skdy hn[

iksy dy kMm Awauxw, iehI s`cI im`qrqw dI inSwnI hY[

“suK mY Awin bhuqu imil bYTq rhq chU idis GyrY ]”

ieh vrqwrw qW jgq ivc Awm vyKx nMU imldw hI hY pr

jnm mrx duhhU mih nwhI jn praupkwrI Awey ]

XW Pyr

mÚ 5 ]
ijn@w idsMdiVAw durmiq vM\Y imqR AswfVy syeI ]
hau FUFydI jgu sbwieAw jn nwnk ivrly kyeI ]2]

vwly gurisK, BweI, mIq, dosq ijnHW nMU vyK ky qlwk vwlI Bwvnw, joVy ivcoN Awpxy Awp hI iqAwgI jwvy, AYsy gurisK lBxy hI pYNdy hn qy ivrly huMdy hn[pr vD qoN vD iek dUjy dI shwieqw krnI qy kMm Awauxw cwhIdw hY[ imqrW dw rol bhuq Aihm hY jo imqrW nMU inBwauxw cwhIdw hY[

3)        prcwrk vIrW dw rol: isK Drm ivc qlwk dI AwigAw nw hox krky Aqy AnMd kwrj dI rsm Awm qOr qy prcwrkW vloN inBweI jwx krky, qlwk jW qlwk vl vDdI qor nMU rokxw, sulJwauxw, nyk Aqy lwiek prcwrkW dw vI Prz Aqy izMmyvwrI hY[

Dwrmk Kyqr ivc hox krky, prcwrk Awm qOr qy Awm bMidAW qoN izAwdw igAwn rKdy hn qy ies krky qlwk nMU rokx ivc bhuq izAwdw Aqy vDIAw rol inBw skdy hn[

isK prvwrW ivc qlwk nMU rokx leI hr isK prcwrk nUM auqSwhq rihxw cwhIdw hY qy AwpxI izMmyvwrI smJxI cwhIdI hY[

AwE, ies lyK dI AKIr ivc ieh vI ivcwr leIey ik iek ivcoly (Bwv negotiator) dw kI rol hY Aqy aus ivc ikhVy ikhVy gux hoxy cwhIdy hn!

muK qOr qy iek ivcoly dy XW ivcoligrI kr rhI tIm dy, swfI smJ Anuswr, 3 Aihm gux XW SrqW hoxIAW zrUrI hn[ AwE, ivcwrIey ik ivcoilAW ivc ikhVy 3 gux hoxy zrUrI hn[

1)         ivcolw (XW ivcoligrI kr rhI tIm) inrp`K hovy Aqy idAwnqdwrI Anuswr ivAwhk joVy nMU muV iekiTAW krn dw idlI cwhvwn hovy[ ies ivc nwl ieh kihxw vI auicq hY ik ieh swry kwrj leI ivcolw auqSwhq hovy qy ies cwA nwl BirAw hovy ik vwihgurU jI imhr krx qy ieh joVw muV iek`iTAW ho jwvy[ Bwvnw Aqy cwA qoN ibnw iksy vI kwrj dI sPlqw nhI iml skdI!

2)         jdoN vI koeI qlwk dy nyVy siQqI phuMcI hovy qW ieh suBwvk hY ik donW iDrW dIAW iek dUjy pRqI AwpxIAW AwpxIAW iSkwieqW huMdIAW hn[ ienHW nMU sulJwauxw Aiq lwzmI huMdw hY[ivcoligrI krn dw ieh lwB huMdw hY ik pqI qy pqnI Awpxw Awpxw guBwr / iSkwieqW / issues / mu`dy iksy ivcoly nMU ds skdy hn[ jy ivcolw hovy hI nw qW Pyr qW qlwk vwly pwsy gl jw hI rhI huMdI hY ijs nMU rokxw hI qW ivcoly dw rol hY Aqy izkr kIqw jw irhw hY[

ivcoly dw ieh dUjw vfw gux Aqy loV hY ik auh pqI pqnI dy iekiTAW krn ivc, jo donW dIAW iSkwieqW Aqy issues hn, aunHw nMU suxy qy aunHW dw hl lBy!

audwrhx dy qOr qy mMn leIey ik iksy qlwk nMU rokx ivc iek ivcolw rol inBw irhw hY[donW pqI pqnI nMUU AwpxI AwpxI iSkwieq iek sUcI (list) ivc ilKx dI ihdwieq kIqI jw skdI hY[ donW dIAW sUcIAW (lists) ivcoN iek iek gl nMU, Bwv iek iek point nMU, ivcolw XW ivcoligrI kr rhI team, suxy, sulJwvy, Aqy Xog PYslw suxwauNdI, share krdI hoeI Agy vDdI jwvy[

“hWjI Point # 7, BYxjI ieQy qusI glq ho! swfy iKAwl ivc ieh gl vIrjI / BwjI / BweI swihb jI dI (Bwv husband dI ) TIk hY[ ikau jI (tIm dy bwkI members dw opinion lYNdy hoey…) kI ivcwr hY Awp sB dw?” iesy pRkwr tIm dy hor pRymI ies gl dw Awpxw ivcwr idMdy hoey joVy nMU ipAwr nwl mnwauNdy hoey Agy vDI clx!

“clo jI, Agly point qy gl krdy hW….point # 8….myry iKAwl ivc vIrjI qusI ieQy glq ho, AsI BYxjI vl (Bwv wife vl) hW ies point qy[ ikau ipAwirE, kI ivcwr Awp sB dw (tIm dy bwkI sihXogIAW nwl gl krdy hoey)?”

ies prkwr donW pqI Aqy pqnI dy, iek iek krky swry point address kIqy jw skdy hn[

ieh krx nwl ienswP  dI feeling AwvygI Bwv jo pqI-pqnI ivckwr kuJ misunderstandings hn auh dUr ho jwxgIAW[ jy ivcolw hovy hI nW (ijs krky Awm isK couples Aj tu`t rhy hn) qW ieh sB kuJ dsxw hI iks nMU hY ikau ik suxn vwlw hI koeI hY nhI qy pqI pqnI Awps ivc qW pihlW qoN hI bol nhI rhy qy qlwk vl vD rhy hn!

ieh hY mihmw ivcoly dI!

3)        qIsrw qy bhuq hI Aihm gux ivcoly dw (Xw ivcoligrI kr rhI team dw) ieh hY ik sB ipAwr vwly hox[ ijQy ivcoly, GrylU pDr qy ienswP dI pUrqI krx dy kwbl hox auQy ipAwr krnw, hsdy hsdy donW nMU iekiTAW krnW, ieh vI ivcoligrI krn leI AqI zrUrI hY[ ijQy bxdw ienswP dyxw idvwauxw hY, auQy ieh gl nW BulI jwvy ik ieh islislw koeI do pwrtIAW ivc kyvl ienswP dw hI nhI hY sgoN iek prvwrk mhOl hox krky, pqI-pqnI dw ieh irSqw ipAwr qy KVHw hY[ ivcoly jdoN ipAwr vMFxgy, Awpxy Awp sihj suBwie hI ipAwr dI KuSbU pqI pqnI gRihx krdy hoey Awpxy Asl irSqy Aqy aus dy ipAwr nMU pihcwnx dy kwbl ho jwxgy Aqy koeI kwrn nhI ik muV pRym ipAwr nwl iekTy nw ho jwx!

ieh hn swfI smJ ivc ivcoilAW dy gux Aqy zrUrI SrqW[ jo auprokq 3 guxW Aqy ivcoligrI dIAW SrqW nMU inBwA skdw hY, auh iek cMgw ivcolw swbq hovygw! qlwk ivcoligrI krn nwl bhuq sohxy qy sPl qrIky nwl roky jw skdy hn!

kuJ ku hor point swfy smJ ivc Awey hn[ auh vI swJy kr leIey jI:

1)         ivcoligrI kr rhI team ivc donoN BYxW Aqy vIr hox[ Dwrmk SbdwvlI ivc isMG/ isMGxIAW kih skdy hW[ ies nwl donW iDrW, Bwv pqI Aqy pqnI dIAW hr iksm dIAW glW swJIAW kIqIAW Aqy sulJweIAW jw skdIAW hn[ ies nwl iek mukMml Aqy loVINdw mhOl Awpxy Awp bx jwvygw[

2)      ikqy gl bwq ivc loV pvy XW koeI AYsI siQqI bx jwvy ik pqI XW pqnI ivcoilAW dI iekiTAW krn dI gl nMU prvwx hI nw krx XW Pyr ivcoilAw dw ivc Awaux hI prvwx nw krn, Bwv ik qlwk vl vDx vl p`kw hI PYslw, ibnW hL liBAW jW aus pRqI Xqn kIiqAW, kr lYx qW AYsI siQqI ivc pqI XW pqnI jo qlwk vl vDx dw pUrw PYslw krI bYTw hY aus nMU ieh kihxw auicq qy FukvW hovygw ik “cMgw bIbwjI/ cMgw vIr jIE, jy qusI gurU swihb jI dI hzUrI ivc AnMd kwrn krvw ky Aj qlwk vl vD rhy ho qW Pyr qusI sRI gurU gRMQ swihb jI mhwrwj dy dyxdwr ho ijnHW dI hzUrI ivc qusI iksy smyN Awpxy jIvn swQI nwl swQ inBwaux dw pRx ilAw sI”!

swfI smJ Aqy isdk ieh kihMdw hY ik jdoN ieh gl khI jwvygI qW zrUr Awpxw rMg ivKwvygI Aqy aunHW dy mn nMU muV ivcwrn dI pRyrnw dyvygI Aqy qlwk vl vDx qoN rokygI[

3)        isK jgq ivc AYsy marriage reconciliation group bxny cwhIdy hn[ ienHW dw gurm`q XW gurmuKI nwm “AnMd kwrj pRoVqw grup”, “qlwk- rok grup”, “ ivAwh mzbUq kro- grup!”, Awid AnykW nwm rKy jw skdy hn[

Aj loV hY ik ijQy ijQy isK prvwr vsdy hn, vD cV ky ieh loV muqwbk syvw dw pRbMD hovy[ ijQy ijQy vI loV smJI jwvy, auQy auQy ipAwr nwl sMprk krky, BYxW / vIrW dw sQwnk grup syvw ivc hwzr ho ky gurU swihb jI dIAW KuSIAW pRwpq kr skdw hY Aqy Awpxy hI isK BrwvW dy AnMd kwrjW nMU qlwk vl ruVy jwx qoN rok skdw hY!

4)         AnMd kwrjW ivc G`t qoN G`t A`Dy GMty dw pRogrwm isiKAw dw vI riKAw jwxw cwhIdw hY ijs ivc gRihsqI jIvn dy v`K v`K pihlUAW bwry cwnxw pwieAw jwvy Aqy isK Drm ivc qlwk dI AwigAw nW hox bwry vI spSt rUp ivc ds idqw jwvy[

5)         ieh lyK, dys prdys ivc AnykW isK prvwrW dy qjribAW qy ADwrq iqAwr kIqw igAw hY Aqy isK jgq dI syvw ivc, Awaux vwlIAW pIVIAW dI cVdI klw nMU muK rKdy hoey, Ajoky isK prvwrW nMU qlwk qoN bcwaux ihq, ipAwr nwl isK BweIcwry dy pRym sihq Byt kIqw jWdw hY[

6)         AsI isK vIrW / BYxW / prvwrW nMU bynqI krWgy ik ieh lyK Awpxy Awpxy BweIcwrk Kyqr ivc Aqy gurisK jQybMdIAW nwl vI sWJw krn[ AYsy praupkwrI ivcolw-syvw grup Awp bxwE qy dUsirAw nMU vI ies syvw ivc Awaux leI auqSwhq kro[

AsI eyku ipqw eyks ky hm bwirk qU myrw gur hweI ]

hox dw sbUq qW hI dy skdy hW jy iksy joVy nMU qlwk vl vDx qoN rokx dw auprwlw Aqy Xqn krIey[

7)        swry ies Xqn Aqy concept nMU documentation rwhI hor suKwlw vI bxwieAw jw skdw hY[ PDF bxw ky sB inSkwm volunteers nMU training idqI jw skdI hY ik ies swry syvw ivc ikvy ikvy kMm krnw hY[

8)        AwE, ieh Ardws vI krIey ik isK jgq ivcoN gurU swihb ikrpw krky qlwk vrgI smwjk burweI dUr kr dyx!

sRI gurU Amrdws swihb scy pwqSwh jI dw Purmwn hY:

jy loVih vru bwlVIey qw gur crxI icqu lwey rwm ]

AsI aumId krdy hW ik ieh lyK swfy BweIcwry ivcoN gurm`q dy cwnx Anuswr AnMd kwrjW dI pivqrqw nMU mzbUq bxwaux ivc shweI hovygw Aqy isK Drm ivcoN qlwk vrgIAW lwhnqW nMU bwhr kFx ivc Awpxw Xogdwn pwvygw! vwihgurU jI kw Kwlsw vwihgurU jI kI Pqih] Awp dw SuB-icMqk, kulbIr isMG 16 jUn, 2016 (ies lyK ivc Font, GurbaniLipi vriqAw igAw hY)

ELECTION VS SELECTION IN GURDWARA SAHIBS

ELECTION VS SELECTION IN GURDWARA SAHIBS:

In our contemporary times, we see Gurdwara elections as a normal and default process for the running of Sikh Gurdwaras. We see one group (or slate) contesting the other group (or slate) during election time. Sometime these divisions are based on ideologies or issues around scriptures like Sri Dasam Granth Sahib, at other times these divisions are based on the age of the slate members thereby resulting in Sikh Youth slates or “Bazurgaa” dee slate and yet at other times these are based on other Maryada / protocol  issues like Table/ Chair/ floor issues etc.

Gurdwara Sahibs are normally registered as non-profit charitable organizations or societies under the respective governments. Let’s go a bit beyond that into Gurmat, because of which Gurdwaras are established at the first place. According to Gurmat, Gurdwara Sahib is a place which promotes love, peace, cooperation, mutual understanding and so forth. In other words besides being a non-profit organization from it’s registration standpoint with the government, it is also pro-peace, pro-love, pro-unity, pro-cooperation, pro-understanding and so on, according to Gurmat standpoint.

Gurdwaras or “Dharamsaals” (as were known in earlier centuries) are places to worship God (Waheguru) and do service under the patronage and teachings of our 10 Guru Sahibaans and Gurbani. Nowhere in earlier history of Sikhs or nowhere in Gurbani, a competitive environment with the Sikhs is suggested, hinted, mentioned, endorsed or encouraged!

In the outside real world, there are reasons to be competitive, political and so forth but in the presence of Sri Guru Granth Sahib ji and the home of Sri Guru Granth Sahib ji which we call a Gurdwara Sahib, a competitive spirit based on any spiritual factors is not at all encouraged or endorsed! Guru Sahib held Gatka competitions or martial competitions but never endorsed competitions on or about spiritual and normal religious matters!

Through this article, I am endeavoring to build a consensus for having “Selections” in contrast to having “Elections” in Gurdwara Sahibs.

We all are familiar with the teachings of Gurbani include the famous verses like:

Awie imlu gurisK Awie imlu qU myry gurU ky ipAwry ] rhwau ]
Come, join with me, O Sikh of the Guru, come and join with me. You are my Guru's Beloved. ||Pause||

And

eyku ipqw eyks ky hm bwirk qU myrw gur hweI ]
The One God is our father; we are the children of the One God. You are our Guru.

Guru Sahib called all His Sikhs as His “Parvaar”, His family! Did he not? Let’s for the moment see the Gurbani Tuks calling us all a Family, a Parvaar !

ibliC ibnod Awnµd suK mwxhu Kwie jIvhu isK prvwr ]1]
Revel in it, delight in it, be happy and enjoy peace, and live long, O Sikhs and brethren. ||1||

suiK bYshu sMq sjn prvwru ]

Sit in peace, O Saints, with the family of friends.

qusI puq BweI prvwru myrw min vyKhu kir inrjwis jIau ]
O my children, siblings and family, look carefully in your minds, and see.

^wlsw myro sÍjn pRvwrw ]

suKI bsY moro pirvwrw ]syvk is`K sBY krqwrw ]2]
May my family members live in peace. May my servants and Sikhs live in peace, O God.

How Lovingly Guru Sahib has called us all a “Parvaar! “, a family !! How lucky we are!

Do we have an election in our families? When was the last time you and I had an election in your or my family? Lol ! J

We are all sons and daughters of one Guru Patshah! of Our 10 Guru Sahibaans! Of Gurbani! When then, we are holding elections in the family of Guru Sahib, which in other words is our own family? What right do we have to make and break this family of Guru Sahib ji into a sect, a group, a division, a slate and a political environment?

Election in a Gurdwara is like trying to divide an ocean! An ocean is a free flowing entity ! So, is Sangat !! Let’s be like brothers and sisters in the context of Sikhi and say Goodbye and Farewell to Elections in a Gurdwara !!

Now, let’s go on to discuss how to have alternative methods to run the working of the management in a Gurdwara system! This certainly, as well, needs our attention and addressal.

I will quote S. Raghbir Singh ji Bir from one of his books. He has written a high number of articles about Sikhism from spiritual and worldly matters. There is an article by him on precisely this topic as well. I do not have the exact reference of this article at this time (regarding name of the book, chapter number etc) but it is well within reach as his books are readily available in lots of places.

S. Raghbir Singh ji Bir, about the topic of elections and selection in Sikh Gurdwaras has given a very novel idea! He has suggested that after a certain period of time, say 1, 2 or 3 years, the names of the candidates who would like to do Sewa for the coming term should in written on smaller papers (what we call “Parcheeaa” in Punjabi). These may then be taken in the presence of Guru Maharaj. Ardas should be done for the same purpose as to give the best direction for the candidate selection. Then a child should be made to pick up a “Parchee” from the box. This may be repeated a couple of times depending on the number of members needed for the committee. 

S. Raghbir Singh Bir says that Guru Sahib ji will select the best candidates Himself as this would be done in His Hazuri and with Gurmat intentions!

HOW TO SOLVE DISPUTES OF ANY KIND IN THE PRESENCE OF GURU SAHIB:

A number of times disputes can come up within our community, our committee managements or within Sikhs in general. These may be very valid disputes. My father, Principal Narindar Singh ji shared with me an important historical fact. He said that during the earlier part of the 20^th century, certain two groups came to Sant Attar Singh ji. He was asked to solve their problem or issues.

Sant Attar Singh ji suggested to  the two factions to sit at Sri Akal Takht Sahib and they were asked to do Kirtan or listen to Kirtan for two hours. After that Ardas was to be done to solve the dispute.

As this Gurmat process was done and carried out, it just happened very naturally and as Waheguru ji would have it, newer ideas came to the minds of the two groups’ members and their dispute was easily and amicably solved. Such is the magic of Kirtan and Ardas in Guru Sahib’s Hazuri!

We all know the Gurbani Tuk,

This Shabad is by Guru Arjan Dev Ji in Raag Basant on Pannaa 1185

bsMqu mhlw 5 Gru 2 ihMfol <> siqgur pRswid ] hoie iekqR imlhu myry BweI duibDw dUir krhu ilv lwie ] hir nwmY ky hovhu joVI gurmuiK bYshu sPw ivCwie ]1] With these Gurmat tools, all is possible!

This Gurmat peace making strategy can be used for dispute resolution of any kind and of any level. Puratan Sikhs used this very often and we need to revive this practice too.

In my own personal opinion, the dispute of Gurdwara Sahib Ross Street Vancouver which has been continuing since 1996 on the issues of Langar protocol can be very amicably solved if all concerned parties inspite of whatever happened in those days show their willingness and come forward for unity and conflict resolution.

It is sad to see that even till today, after 20 years, we as a community have failed to unite in Vancouver on Langar issue, thereby dividing the Sangat since the last 20 years. This state is not representative of Sikhism. Both parties need to come forward and with Guru Sahib’s blessings all is possible!

We hope that these humble ideas and suggestions will be endorsed by Sikh Sadh Sangat worldwide and if it is according to Gurmat, then may be considered for implementation as well.

All and any of us, who would like peaceful and loving environments in our Gurdwara Sahibs may consider adopting Selections in Gurdwaras and phasing out elections in the coming times. This will be, hopefully, the dawn of good times in our Gurdwara Sahib settings and pave way to lots of happiness, effulgence and glory!

Are we in?

Waheguru ji ka Khalsa Waheguru ji ki fateh

Request to Sikhs of Sri Amritsar Sahib to stop consuming Alcohol!

Let's all strive to make Sikh community absolutely away from Alcohol!

                                        

Sikhs residing in Sri Amritsar Sahib are encouraged and requested to stop drinking or serving alcohol.

On one hand we want and demand "holy status" for city of Sri Amritsar Sahib yet on the other hand, we drink and serve alcohol, right in the city of Sri Amritsar Sahib. There is a great usage of alcohol among people of Amritsar.

If we really want the Holy Status of Sri Amritsar Sahib (declared and implemented), it is simply important to make our lives holy first! Let's pledge not to drink or serve alcohol!

This Shabad is by Guru Amar Daas Ji in Raag Bihaagraa on Pannaa 554

slok mÚ 3 ] mwxsu BirAw AwixAw mwxsu BirAw Awie ] ijqu pIqY miq dUir hoie brlu pvY ivic Awie ] Awpxw prwieAw n pCwxeI Ksmhu Dky Kwie ] ijqu pIqY Ksmu ivsrY drgh imlY sjwie ] JUTw mdu mUil n pIceI jy kw pwir vswie ] nwnk ndrI scu mdu pweIAY siqguru imlY ijsu Awie ] sdw swihb kY rMig rhY mhlI pwvY Qwau ]1]Salok, Third Mehla: One person brings a full bottle, and another fills his cup. Drinking the wine, his intelligence departs, and madness enters his mind; he cannot distinguish between his own and others, and he is struck down by his Lord and Master. Drinking it, he forgets his Lord and Master, and he is punished in the Court of the Lord. Do not drink the false wine at all, if it is in your power. O Nanak, the True Guru comes and meets the mortal; by His Grace, one obtains the True Wine. He shall dwell forever in the Love of the Lord Master, and obtain a seat in the Mansion of His Presence. ||1||

Are we ready?

Waheguru ji ka Khalsa Waheguru ji ki fateh!

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